Friendship, love, faith, choice, forgiveness, loyalty, courage, truth, honesty, tolerance, gratefulness, responsibility, happiness…..these are “big” words, carrying a lot of deep meaning and expectations.
What do you imagine or feel when you recite the above parade…? What emotions does it bring in you?
They are very powerful words, which describe humanity at its best, something we stride to “acquire”…master and become. They make me want to stand up a little taller, open my heart wider, feel peace and tingling, happy sensation of being alive.. The ever knowing, quiet and observing part inside of us, knows intuitively, we were meant to live our lives as the manifestations of those virtues.
Many times we simply don’t…Our silent insider, in other words, soul or conscious is aware of discrepancy in our behavior...but doesn’t judge, just acknowledge. The conflict arrives through the ego, taking on the role of the only representation of that person. It sends different messages of needs and wants, never fully satisfied in the constant battle for more.
It is difficult to become aware and to be able to recognize the source of our motives and actions. Which “spark” initiated that thought…. or feeling… I’ve noticed long time ago the presence of the observer…remember as a child the feeling of almost “stepping outside “of myself and watching some of my actions….just with stoic, unattached curiosity. I believed, I was just “built” this way to sort of see the world from inside and outside. Not until, years later when I’ve started taking yoga classes and found the “observer”, deep at the core of me, during meditation class and had the ahh moment… The stillness and ever knowing fabric is very different from engaged and “busy”, opinionated, talkative ego.
The choices, we make in our lives are the result of ego, conscience (soul) or most often mixture of them. As long as we know what fuels our actions, we are not moving blindly through decisions….but ability to distinguish the difference is essential. Not to confuse ourselves only with ego or super ego, which loves competition, being always right, revenge, unforgiveness, self absorption, guilt, shame, winning, jealousy, rage, fear, distrust, control…
Ego and super ego are one and the same; the only difference lies in degree of saturations… All the above are the characteristic of super ego…blown up to humongous proportions. On the other hand healthy self esteem, ability to see your own uniqueness and individuality are the expression of ego but in positive way…
Balance is the key word in my adult vocabulary...it applies practically everywhere. Here, is no different, achieving the balance not only in ego itself, to keep it, as a beneficial part of our existence, but most importantly in the union between soul and ego, that’s our goal and lesson in life.
Recognizing, is the first step …letting go of ego domination and tuning to your inner voice, second...It may take a long time, to become sensitive and intelligent at the same time to the delicate balance of those two aspects of “you” as the whole human being. The process of uncovering layers, letting go of distractive parts and living your life trusting the quiet, still, inner self…called soul or maybe, the seed of God is our journey.
For those who meditate the feeling of unity with the world is well known, followed by the trust and peace, the opposite work of ego ( we may choose to call it also mind) results in separation from everybody, fear and need to control.
The process of choosing to feel and act based on your soul and keeping your ego “wholesome and healthy” is not an easy one but very rewarding, bringing at the end joy, happiness, peace and the most importantly love.
Wishing everyone the best on your journey…no matter at which point you are at this moment in your life. It’s been said so many times that “Journey begins with the first step “…it’s your decision when and how, what is important that you are aware, you are on the journey and able to see the winding road ahead.