Imperfections 86th Day 03-27

by Administrator 27. March 2011 02:00


Imperfections are not only wanted but needed ….It took me a little more than it should,   to stop trying to be “perfect”. Did I know it was impossible?  Sure, I did …never less it was not stopping me to try… The self imposed image of a super mom tackling all possible tasks in a swift manner was my definition of a well spend day. Was it fun? Actually it was …but it was also very demanding and stressful at the times. I was exhausted, not fully enjoying  the” right now” moment ,replaced by well oiled machinery of a strict schedule. Such a demanding plan was taking toll on me and I was becoming more and more rigid…not only with myself but also with people around me. The state of overly critical and self righteous might be  just steps away  from that point.

 On the other hand, admitting to your own imperfections and shortcomings is a very liberating experience. You are fully aware to try your best, but without imposing the need to be always the best. It is not only humbling observation but the one which opens the door for greater tolerance of others as well. If we can be smart, lovable, funny, responsible ….and more, without trying to portray the flawless vision, we are more likely to be more understanding of others faults, mistakes and imperfections. It is not only more tolerant, realistic, wiser and peaceful approach to all of us but also one capable of greater compassion and love without list of conditions.

I found, that realistic perception through the eyes of my kids…especially my daughter is very heartwarming. My “naked truth “ of being not invincible but human… brought me much closer to them and  allowed us to bring understanding and truth, in place of high expectations and demands. What I love the most is their support, belief and acceptance …there are minors disagreements and differences of in every friendship.  I suppose they are just smarter …than me…I took me longer to understand shortcomings of my parents…and make a peace with that.

The feeling of being in a “rat race” …not only with the other people but also with yourself  is very demanding and draining of energy… Relaxing a little and setting the goals based on your real needs not imposed by our super ego…responsible for this drive to perfection is a real gift to yourself. The need to compare and compete is part of being human …the act of embracing your own or other people’s limits is a process of letting go and becoming a part of the universe. We are all great, good, poor and terrible at something …but we think, that by becoming great at everything, better than everyone else, we will win the magic key…which opens the door to happiness…It doesn’t …that’s not the key…or the way to it…

I didn’t mention …our self absorption with the looks…I know, we don’t want to get old or look old. Majority of us want to feel as a desirable symbol of beauty, sexiness and attractiveness. We spend not only money but also time to perfect and polish our “exterior”…many times forgetting to take care of more important aspects of our health…proper nutrition, emotional or intellectual needs… I am not “puritan “ and judgmental about wanting to improve yourself…but it makes me wonder and question the direction of our society, spending so much effort in the battle for the “perfect” look and existence of gratifying system…rewarding merely cookie cutter image…. Personally, I find people with all “quirky “personalities and individual looks more attractive…they are themselves…interesting to watch or get to know...imperfect and unique but also unforgettable…

Some of my friends, who had a chance to get to know me over the years, are laughing at my childlike enthusiasm and happy acceptance for certain “awkwardness” of people I know… I suppose the imperfection means to me… to be more truthful, real...and in the end that makes it interesting, exiting and colorful…

 Admitting and accepting of own shortcomings is such an important process in self discovery, followed by the feeling of self worth despite … imperfections. Moving away from putting a” price tag”, being judgmental or constantly ‘fixing” to achieve perfection will free some of the  energy to pursue something else…worthwhile…

Well…if you choose to “achieve “the goal …of becoming your own perfection…first of all you should know …it will never end…you will always be chasing the next best improvement….never quite happy with the status quo...

We are all lovable…the way we are … always trying our best… maybe never coming close to it….. and that’s not only acceptable but perfectly human….




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The Little Prince

"People where you live," the little prince said, "grow five thousand roses in one garden... yet they don't find what they're looking for..."

"They don't find it," I answered.

"And yet what they're looking for could be found in a single rose, or a little water..."

"Of course," I answered.

And the little prince added, "But eyes are blind. You have to look with the heart."








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